My courage buddy (Anna) and I went to London last weekend to watch 'Sister Act' on the stage. It was an amazing show and we had a really fun day together. Anna had the crazy idea that we should have a go at doing a treasure hunt on the tube! Her reasoning was that if we could do a treasure hunt on the tube (where nobody tends to speak to anyone else and there's nowhere to run and hide) we could do one anywhere!
When we arrived at St. Pancras we had the chance to settle our nerves with a quick Costa ;o) and then we set about creating our treasure maps. On the way to the tube we spoke to one lady who we thought was on our map but none of the clues made sense to her. On to the tube it was!
We had 3 stops on the tube before getting off at Oxford Circus. An initial look around the carriage showed us there was no-one matching any of our clues (Big fat PHEW!) But then at our first stop a guy came onto the tube and stood right next to me. The first thing I spotted was a hearing aid in his right ear (Oh no!)
I wrestled with my fear for a long while before Anna turned round to see him too. Then we wrestled with our combined fear together! Could we bring ourselves to speak to this complete stranger on a London tube where our conversation would be heard by all? I'm sad to say that this time round the answer was no.
After about half an hour of 'beating myself up' because I gave into fear, I realised that this had actually been a really helpful experience. What it revealed is that I don't have what it takes to be bold 'in the moment' without God breaking in. I've walked through quite alot of fear over the past few years and I think I'd come to rely on myself and my own strength to see breakthrough. Now I know to a new level that I'm totally dependent on God.
Anna and I are planning to head to the tubes again sometime in the future. There'll be much rejoicing when we get to walk through fear and see God's Kingdom break out. It will all be down to the grace of God and ALL glory will go to Him!